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Divorcing a Spouse in a Foreign Country: A Guide for California Residents

Divorcing a spouse is never simple, but when that spouse lives in a different country, the process can feel even more overwhelming. If you’re in California and want to end your marriage to someone abroad, there are specific steps you need to follow to ensure the process is smooth and legal. This includes understanding how to serve divorce papers internationally and navigating the complexities of different legal systems.

While it might seem complicated, familiarizing yourself with California’s residency requirements for filing a divorce can significantly ease the process. At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we will help you understand the basics, and knowing your options can make a significant difference.

File for Divorce in California

The first step in starting your divorce is filing the necessary paperwork. To do this, you’ll need to meet the state’s residency requirements:

  • Live in California for at least six months.
  • Reside in the county where you’ll file for divorce for at least three months.

Once you meet these requirements, you can file the divorce petition in your county’s Superior Court. Be prepared to pay a filing fee, which typically ranges between $435 and $450. If the fee is a financial burden, you can request a fee waiver from the court.

Serving Divorce Papers Abroad

Serving divorce papers to a spouse in another country is where things can get tricky. The law requires that your spouse is properly notified about the divorce, and this notification must meet both the state law and the legal requirements of the country where your spouse resides. Here are your main options:

If You’re in Contact With Your Spouse:

  1. Ask for a waiver of service.
    If your spouse is cooperative, they can agree to waive formal service by signing a waiver. This can save you time and hassle.
  2. Send papers via certified mail.
    For some countries, serving papers through certified mail with a return receipt may suffice. However, always confirm the specific rules for the country involved.

If You’re Not in Contact or Your Spouse Is Uncooperative:

  1. Use the Hague Service Convention.
    If the country is a member of the Hague Service Convention, you can submit the paperwork to a designated office in that country, which will handle the service process.
  2. Public posting or publication.
    If your spouse cannot be located despite your best efforts, you can request court approval to serve them through alternative methods, like public posting or publication in a local newspaper.
  3. Hire a professional.
    If your spouse is temporarily in another country or hard to locate, a private investigator or a local process server might be able to track them down and serve the papers.

Step 3: Proceed With the Divorce

Once your spouse has been served, the divorce can move forward. The process will depend on whether your spouse responds to the filing:

If Your Spouse Responds:

  • Negotiate agreements.
    This might include dividing property, arranging spousal support, and deciding on child custody if you have children.
  • Attend mediation or court hearings as needed.
    These steps help settle disputes before finalizing the divorce.

If Your Spouse Doesn’t Respond:

  • Request a default judgment.
    If your spouse fails to respond within the required time, the court can proceed without their input. The exact timeline and procedures can vary by state and even by county.  However, you’ll still need to provide evidence and follow the court’s rules regarding child custody, support, and property division.

Important Things to Keep in Mind

When dealing with an international divorce, there are a few extra hurdles to consider. One of the biggest is how the courts handle cases involving spouses or assets in other countries. Let’s look at how jurisdiction comes into play and why it’s such an important factor in these situations.

Jurisdiction and International Challenges

While California courts have jurisdiction over divorces filed by state residents, personal jurisdiction over a spouse living abroad can be a hurdle. This issue might arise when dividing assets or enforcing custody arrangements. Courts may need to apply the state’s laws to assets located overseas, which could add complications.

Property Division

California is a community property state, meaning assets and debts acquired during the marriage are generally split 50/50. This rule extends to quasi-community property—assets acquired abroad that would have been community property if earned in California.

Child Custody

If children are involved, international custody issues may arise, especially if your spouse wishes to relocate the children. The Hague Convention on International Child Abduction may help resolve disputes, but it depends on the specific circumstances and the country involved.

Recognition of Your Divorce

While many countries recognize U.S. divorces, not all do. If your spouse’s country doesn’t recognize the divorce, additional steps may be required to ensure the legal dissolution of your marriage is recognized there. Given the complexities involved, it’s often advisable to consult with legal professionals familiar with both U.S. and international family law when dealing with international divorces.

Ready to Start the Process?

International divorces might feel daunting, but you don’t have to tackle this alone. With our experience in international family law, our firm at Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC is here to guide you through every step of the process. If you’re ready to move forward or have questions about your unique situation, we’re here to help.

Contact us today at 855-426-9111 to discuss your case and explore how we can make this process more manageable. Our team will provide personalized guidance tailored to your needs.

Dating During Divorce in California: Proceed with Caution

Divorce is never easy. It’s a time of emotional distress, major life adjustments, and often, uncertainty about the future. During this period, it’s natural to want connection and companionship.

But if you’re considering dating while your divorce is still pending in California, it’s important to tread carefully. While dating might feel like a way to regain some control and confidence,  divorce can bring legal and emotional complications that are worth understanding upfront.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, a Professional Law Corporation, we’ve spent decades helping families navigate California’s divorce process. With over 300 years of combined legal experience and a team that includes Certified Family Law Specialists, we’re dedicated to providing guidance that protects your rights and your future. In this article, we’ll discuss what you need to know before stepping into the dating scene during your divorce.

Potential Legal Impacts

The legal impacts of divorce can be complex, making it important to consider the key factors that may influence the process. In California, the state's no-fault divorce law is important for decisions like dividing property and spousal support. Let’s explore what this law means and how it could impact your case.

California’s No-Fault Divorce Law

California is a no-fault divorce state, meaning courts don’t consider fault, such as adultery when granting a divorce. Dating before your divorce is final can still affect your case, especially if it looks improper. Judges may not directly penalize you for dating, but your actions could impact decisions about spousal support, property division, or child custody.

Custody Considerations

Bringing a new partner into your children’s lives too soon can affect child custody. If your dating life disrupts their routines or emotional well-being, it could raise concerns for the court. For instance, if your new partner causes conflict or your children feel uncomfortable, a judge might adjust custody or visitation plans.

What to avoid:

  • Introducing a new partner to your children early on.
  • Allowing your new relationship to interfere with established parenting schedules.

Waste of Marital Assets

Using marital funds on a new relationship—such as buying expensive gifts, taking trips, or covering shared living costs—can be viewed as wasting assets. Courts take this seriously and might adjust property division to make up for these expenses. Example: If you use joint funds to pay for a weekend getaway with a new partner, it could come back to haunt you during property negotiations.

Emotional Considerations

Divorce is an emotional journey that affects everyone involved. While personal feelings are important, it’s just as crucial to think about how the situation might affect children, who often face their own challenges during this period.

Impact on Children

Children are often the most vulnerable during a divorce. Seeing a parent date before the dust has settled can be confusing or even hurtful. They may worry about their family’s future or feel caught in a loyalty conflict.

How to handle this thoughtfully:

  • Focus on providing stability and reassurance to your children.
  • Wait to introduce a new partner until the divorce is finalized and your children have adjusted.

Complicating the Divorce Process

Divorces can already be contentious, and dating can add fuel to the fire. Jealousy or resentment from your spouse may lead to delays in negotiations, making it harder to reach agreements on critical issues like property division or parenting plans.

Rebound Relationships

It’s tempting to jump into a new relationship as a way to cope, but rebound relationships are often short-lived and emotionally fraught. Without processing the emotions tied to your divorce, you may find it harder to make clear, healthy choices in a new relationship.

Recommendations

Making important decisions during a divorce can feel overwhelming, but having clear advice can help. A good first step is to consult with an attorney who can offer expert guidance specific to your situation.

1. Consult with an Attorney

Before entering the dating scene, consult with a California family law attorney. They can provide personalized advice based on your circumstances and help you avoid missteps that could harm your case.

2. Prioritize Your Children

Your kids’ emotional needs should come first. Avoid introducing new partners until they’ve had time to process the changes in their family.

3. Be Honest

If you choose to date, be upfront with your attorney and transparent about how it might impact your divorce. Hiding aspects of your personal life can create legal complications down the road.

4. Be Mindful of Social Media

Resist the urge to post about your dating life online. Photos or comments can easily be misinterpreted and used against you in court.

5. Focus on Healing

Take time for yourself. Seek counseling, reconnect with hobbies, and allow yourself the space to grieve the end of your marriage. Entering a new relationship with a clear mind and heart is essential for building a healthy future.

Let Holstrom, Block & Parke Help You Protect Your Interests

Divorce is challenging, but you don’t have to go through it alone. At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we bring years of experience and compassion to every case. If you’re facing questions about dating during divorce—or any other legal concern—we’re here to provide answers and protect what matters most to you.

Contact us today at 855-426-9111 for a confidential consultation with a Certified Family Law Specialist. Let us help you find the best way forward.

Can You Get a Divorce Without Going to Court?

Divorce can feel overwhelming—both emotionally and logistically. Many people picture a heated courtroom battle when they think about divorce, but that’s not always the case. The truth is, in California, there are ways to end your marriage without setting foot in a courtroom. If you and your spouse are willing to work together, some paths can save you time, stress, and money.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, a Professional Law Corporation, we’ve spent years helping couples get through the divorce process in California. With over 300 years of combined legal experience, including a large number of Certified Family Law Specialists (CFLS)*, we’re dedicated to finding the best solutions for our clients. Let’s explore how you might be able to avoid the courtroom during your divorce.

Exploring Out-of-Court Divorce Solutions

Ending your marriage without court is possible through several approaches, with uncontested divorce being one of the simplest options.

Uncontested Divorce

An uncontested divorce is one of the simplest ways to avoid court. This process works when both spouses agree on key issues, such as:

  • Division of assets and debts
  • Child custody and visitation schedules
  • Child support and spousal support (if applicable)

While it’s possible to finalize an uncontested divorce largely outside of court, California law still requires a judge to review and approve the agreement. In some cases, a brief court appearance might be necessary to finalize the process.

Mediation

Mediation involves working with a neutral third party, known as a mediator, to resolve disputes. The mediator helps both spouses reach agreements on contentious issues without taking sides. This approach is especially useful for couples who want to maintain control over the outcome while reducing conflict.

Here’s what you can expect during mediation:

  • Collaborative discussions led by the mediator
  • Focus on finding solutions that work for both parties
  • Privacy throughout the process, unlike public court proceedings

While mediation isn’t legally binding on its own, agreements reached during mediation can be submitted to the court for approval.

Collaborative Divorce

Collaborative divorce is another option for avoiding the courtroom. In this process:

  • Both spouses hire attorneys trained in collaborative law.
  • Everyone commits to resolving the divorce outside of court.
  • If the process fails, the attorneys must withdraw, and new representation is required for litigation.

This method encourages open communication and cooperation, often resulting in more amicable outcomes.

Arbitration

While arbitration is less common in divorce cases, it’s an option for couples who can’t agree on certain issues but want to avoid traditional litigation. In arbitration:

  • Both parties present their case to a private arbitrator (often a retired judge or experienced attorney).
  • The arbitrator makes binding decisions on unresolved matters.

Arbitration is typically faster and more private than court, though it’s still a more formal process than mediation or collaborative divorce.

Benefits of Avoiding Court

Choosing an out-of-court option has several advantages:

Reduced Stress and Conflict

Litigation often escalates tension between spouses. Out-of-court options prioritize cooperation, which can make the process less emotionally draining.

Greater Control Over Outcomes

When you work together outside of court, you have more say in the final agreement. This ensures the result reflects your unique family’s needs.

Cost Savings

Avoiding court can save you thousands of dollars in attorney fees and court costs. Mediation and collaborative divorce are generally more affordable than traditional litigation.

Faster Resolution

Court schedules can be unpredictable, leading to delays. Out-of-court options allow you to move at your own pace, often resolving matters more quickly.

Increased Privacy

Court filings are public records, but mediation and collaborative divorce keep personal details confidential.

When Court May Be Necessary?

While avoiding court is possible in many cases, there are situations where court involvement is unavoidable:

  • High Conflict or Domestic Violence
    If there’s a history of domestic violence or an inability to compromise, court intervention might be necessary to ensure everyone’s safety.
  • Complex Financial Issues
    Dividing complex assets like businesses, investments, or retirement accounts may require judicial oversight.
  • Protecting Children’s Interests
    When parents can’t agree on custody arrangements, the court steps in to prioritize the child’s well-being.
  • Enforcing Agreements
    If one party fails to honor agreements, such as paying support or dividing assets, a court order may be required to enforce compliance.

Facing Divorce in California? Holstrom, Block & Parke Can Help.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we understand that every divorce is unique. Whether you’re considering mediation, collaborative divorce, or another option, our team is here to guide you every step of the way. With extensive experience in all types of divorce cases, including uncontested divorce and high-conflict situations, we’re committed to helping you find the best path forward.

If you’re ready to discuss your options, call us today to schedule a consultation with one of our Certified Family Law Specialists. We’ll work with you to explore solutions that fit your needs—so you can move forward with confidence.

Is My Divorce Final? How to Verify Your Divorce Decree in California

Divorce is often a long and stressful journey, and once you’ve gone through the process, the last thing you want is uncertainty about its completion. Whether you've been waiting for months or even years, the thought of “Is my divorce final?” can hang over you like a cloud.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we understand that finding closure and being sure that your divorce is legally finalized is crucial for moving forward with confidence.

Our team of Certified Family Law Specialists, with over 300 years of combined experience, has helped countless clients navigate the California divorce process, providing them with clarity during a challenging time.

So, how can you be certain that your divorce is final in California? Let’s break down the steps to verify your divorce decree and make sure everything is in order.

Understanding the Divorce Process in California

Divorce in California follows a specific set of steps, and it’s important to understand where you are in the process. Here’s a brief overview:

  1. Filing the petition: You (or your spouse) start by filing a petition (Forms FL-100 and FL-110) with the court. These documents initiate the divorce process.
  2. Serving the respondent: The other party must be formally notified, allowing them to respond.
  3. Waiting for a response: Once the respondent is served, they have 30 days to reply. If they don’t respond, the case could move forward with a default judgment.
  4. The 6-month waiting period: California law imposes a mandatory 6-month waiting period from the date of service before a divorce can be finalized.
  5. Negotiations or trials: Many divorces involve negotiations or mediation, and if no agreement is reached, a trial may be necessary to resolve disputes.
  6. Final judgment (Form FL-180): Once all issues are resolved, a final judgment is signed by a judge and entered into the court records, officially ending the marriage.

Why Verification Matters

The final divorce decree, also called the "judgment," is the legal paper that officially ends your marriage. But how can you be sure your divorce is truly final?

Verifying that your divorce is final is crucial to protecting your future. If you assume your divorce is complete without confirming it, you could face serious complications down the road.

For instance, if you remarry without a finalized divorce, your new marriage may not be legally valid, leading to legal issues that could affect your personal life and financial well-being.

Also, issues with dividing property can come up later, especially if the divorce wasn’t officially recorded. You might end up unexpectedly sharing assets or dealing with arguments over property that should have been sorted out during the divorce.

Besides these worries, there are other possible legal and financial responsibilities you might not expect. If your divorce isn’t fully finalized, you could still be responsible for joint debts or financial commitments, like taxes or mortgages, that you thought were already taken care of.

It can also affect your ability to claim certain rights, such as spousal or child support.

Key Indicators Your Divorce is Final

Look for these signs to confirm your divorce is final.

Judgment Signed and Filed

The first critical step in finalizing your divorce is obtaining the judge’s signature on the final judgment (Form FL-180). But it doesn’t end there. The judgment must also be filed with the court clerk. Without proper filing, your divorce may not be officially recorded, leaving your legal status in limbo.

Notice of Entry of Judgment

Once the judgment is filed, the court will send out a Notice of Entry of Judgment (Form FL-190). This document shows that the final judgment is officially part of the court records. If you’ve received this notice, it’s a good sign that your divorce is legally recognized.

Waiting Period

California law requires a mandatory 6-month waiting period from the date of service of the divorce petition. Even if the judge signs the final judgment before this period is up, your divorce won’t be officially final until six months and one day after service. If you’re unsure of the exact date, double-check the date of service or response.

Effective Date of Termination

Sometimes the judgment specifies an 'effective date of termination,' which may differ from the final judgment date. Your divorce is only final once this date has passed, so it’s crucial to look for this detail in your paperwork.

How to Verify Your Divorce Decree

Even if you believe your divorce is final, it’s always a good idea to double-check. Here’s how you can verify your divorce decree in California.

Obtain a Copy of the Decree

First, you’ll need a certified copy of your divorce decree. This can be requested from the court where your divorce was finalized. You may be required to pay a small fee, and processing times can vary, so be sure to check with your courthouse for specific details.

Review the Decree for Specific Language

When reviewing your divorce decree, look for specific language that confirms the dissolution of your marriage, such as terms like "dissolution of marriage" or "restoration of single status." These terms indicate that your divorce is final.

Confirm Entry with the Court Clerk

If you want to be certain, contact the court clerk’s office to confirm that your divorce decree has been officially entered into the court records. This additional step can provide peace of mind, especially if you plan to remarry or need to finalize property division.

Online Verification

California also offers an online portal where you can search for court records and verify the status of your divorce. This option can be particularly useful if you need quick confirmation. However, keep in mind that online records may not be available for divorces filed before 1974. You can visit the California Courts website for more information.

Practical Matters After Divorce

Once your divorce is final, there are a few practical steps you’ll want to take to tie up any loose ends. These include:

  • Updating legal documents like wills and life insurance policies.
  • Closing any joint credit card accounts and opening new ones in your name.
  • Transferring vehicle titles with the DMV, if necessary.
  • Informing your employer to update tax withholdings and benefits.

Addressing these matters can help ensure a smooth transition into your post-divorce life and prevent any future financial or legal complications.

Need Help with Your Divorce in California?

If you’re still uncertain about the status of your divorce or need assistance with any aspect of the divorce process, we’re here to help. At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, our team of Certified Family Law Specialists is committed to guiding you through each step, providing the clarity and support you need. Contact us today at 855-426-9111 to schedule a consultation.

Husband Cashed Out 401k During Divorce: What Are My Options?

Finding out your spouse cashed out their 401k during divorce can feel devastating.  The idea of losing part of your retirement savings when you're already going through the difficult process of divorce is overwhelming.

But don’t panic. In California, the law has built-in protections that ensure you aren't left empty-handed if your spouse makes a move like this. So, what are your options?

Let’s look into the steps you can take and how the legal system can help you recover what's rightfully yours.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we know how frustrating it can be to deal with financial surprises during a divorce. With decades of experience in family law, we’re ready to help you fight for your rights and protect your financial future.

So, if you’ve just found out your spouse has withdrawn funds from their 401k, let’s walk through what you need to know.

Consequences of Cashing Out a 401(k) in a Community Property State

First, let’s clarify how California law handles asset division in divorce.

California Law

California is a community property state, meaning all assets, including retirement accounts like a 401(k), earned during the marriage belong equally to both spouses.

If your spouse cashed out the 401(k) without your knowledge or before the divorce was finalized, that’s a violation of this principle. It’s a clear attempt to get ahead in the asset division process, which the courts don’t take lightly.

Illegal Disposal of Assets

Withdrawing funds from a 401(k) or other marital assets without consent isn’t just unfair—it’s illegal. In California, this is known as "dissipation of marital assets."

Simply put, your spouse can’t make unilateral decisions about shared money during a divorce without your permission, and the courts are not likely to look kindly on this kind of behavior.

Financial Penalties

If your spouse is under the age of 59½ and withdraws money from a 401(k), they’ll also face a 10% early withdrawal penalty.

Additionally, any amount they take out will be taxed as ordinary income, which means they could end up with less than they expected after taxes are applied. While this doesn’t directly benefit you, it can come into play when it’s time to seek reimbursement.

Court Orders and Reimbursement

Here’s where things get a little brighter. If your spouse cashed out the 401(k) without your permission, the court can order them to reimburse you for your share. This includes covering any losses you’ve experienced because of the taxes or penalties that hit when they cashed out the funds.

So, while it may feel like a setback, the legal system is on your side.

What Are My Options?

With the legal framework in mind, here’s what you should do next.

Immediate Action

The first thing you’ll want to do is take immediate action. Time is critical, and the quicker you respond, the better your chances of recovering the funds.

Contact an Attorney

As soon as you discover that your spouse has withdrawn funds from their 401(k), reach out to an attorney. This isn’t something you should handle on your own. A lawyer can guide you through the legal steps needed to protect your rights.

Consider Legal Separation

If you haven’t already filed for divorce, but suspect your spouse is making financial moves like this, consider filing for legal separation. This can freeze assets and stop further dissipation.

Gather Information

Once you’ve secured legal help, you’ll want to collect all relevant financial documentation to strengthen your case.

Document Everything

Gather every piece of financial information you can. This includes 401(k) statements, bank statements, and any other financial records. You’ll also want to look for credit card bills, pension plan details, or prenuptial agreements that might be relevant.

Consult a Financial Advisor

If the idea of dealing with all these financial details feels overwhelming, consider getting advice from a financial professional. They can help you understand the long-term tax effects of the withdrawal and create a plan to protect the rest of your assets.

Legal Recourse

Once you’ve gathered your information, there are legal avenues available to help you recover your share of the 401(k).

  • Freeze the Account: Your attorney can help you get a court order to freeze any remaining retirement accounts, stopping any further withdrawals.
  • Secure Your Share: With your lawyer’s help, you can pursue your rightful share of the withdrawn funds, including any penalties or tax losses that occurred.
  • Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO): To make sure future retirement funds are divided properly, your attorney will create a QDRO. This legal order ensures that the division of retirement assets follows the law and helps avoid extra tax penalties.

Settlement vs. Litigation

There are generally two routes you can take when dividing assets during a divorce—settling through negotiation or taking the case to court.

While settlements are usually faster and less expensive, going to court might be needed if your spouse isn’t cooperating or is hiding assets. Your attorney will help you decide the best approach for your specific situation.

Prenuptial Agreements

If you and your spouse had a prenuptial agreement in place, the situation surrounding the 401(k) might be a bit different. A prenuptial agreement can help protect certain assets in a divorce, including retirement accounts.

However, it’s essential that this agreement was properly drafted and executed to hold up in court. If you’re unsure whether your prenup covers retirement funds, it’s time to take a closer look.

Hiding Assets

Finally, it’s important to note that hiding assets—whether it’s a 401(k) or anything else—is illegal during a divorce.

If your spouse tried to cash out the account secretly or failed to report it, they could be held in contempt of court, and the consequences are serious.

Get Help Protecting Your 401(k) in a California Divorce

Don’t let your spouse’s financial decisions compromise your future. If you’ve just discovered that your spouse cashed out their 401(k), we’re here to help.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, our Certified Family Law Specialists have the experience and knowledge to ensure you get your fair share. Contact us today at 855-426-9111  to schedule a consultation. We’re committed to protecting your interests and securing the best possible outcome for you during this challenging time.

Divorce and Mortgages: Can I Assume the Mortgage in California?

Divorce can be a whirlwind of emotions and legal considerations. One of the biggest questions you may face is what happens to the family home.

If you’ve been through the ups and downs of divorce in California, you’ve likely asked yourself, "Can I assume the mortgage?" For many, staying in the home is important—whether for stability, familiarity, or keeping life as steady as possible for the kids.

The good news is, in certain situations, assuming a mortgage is possible in California. Let’s walk through what that process looks like, and whether it's a good option for you.

What is a Loan Assumption?

A loan assumption allows you to take over the current mortgage, keeping the original interest rate and payment schedule. Essentially, the loan is transferred into your name alone, and your ex-spouse's name is removed from it.

This is different from simply continuing to pay the mortgage without assuming it—because with a loan assumption, you become solely responsible for the debt, and your ex is legally off the hook.

Assuming the loan allows you to keep the same monthly payments, which can be especially helpful if you secured a great interest rate.

But here's the key: while you take on the financial responsibility, your ex-spouse will no longer be tied to the loan, giving both parties a clearer financial path forward.

Why Consider Loan Assumption?

Here’s why assuming the mortgage can be beneficial during a divorce:

  • Removing your ex-spouse’s name: Assumption removes your ex from the mortgage, so they won’t have any more ties to the house or the loan.
  • Keeping the interest rate: If you locked in a low interest rate before rates spiked, the assumption can preserve this advantage.
  • Avoiding closing costs: Unlike refinancing, assuming the mortgage allows you to skip many of the closing costs that come with a new loan.
  • Stability for your family: Keeping the home may provide much-needed stability, especially if children are involved, avoiding the disruption of moving.
  • Control over the property: Once the mortgage is in your name, you’ll have full control to sell, refinance, or borrow against the property in the future without involving your ex.

Types of Mortgages and Assumability

Some loans are assumable, but it's crucial to know your mortgage type. Here's a breakdown of the common types:

Assumable vs. Non-Assumable Loans

  • FHA, VA, and USDA loans: These types of loans generally allow for assumption, meaning you can take over the loan without triggering major complications.
  • Conventional loans: Most conventional loans have a "due-on-sale" clause, meaning they can't be assumed when ownership changes. However, there are exceptions to this rule, particularly in cases of divorce.

Garn-St. Germain Act

The Garn-St. Germain Act permits certain mortgage assumptions in divorce cases, even for conventional loans. Basically, it can help you avoid the "due-on-sale" clause in some situations, making it easier to assume a mortgage during a divorce.

VA Loan Considerations

For veterans with a VA loan, assumption is possible, but there’s an important caveat. If a non-veteran ex-spouse assumes the loan, it may impact the veteran’s entitlement to future VA loans.

It’s worth discussing this with your lender or an attorney to understand the full implications.

How to Qualify for a Mortgage Assumption?

Start by contacting your lender if you're interested in assuming the mortgage. Here’s a general rundown of what’s involved:

  • Lender approval: First and foremost, you’ll need the lender’s blessing to assume the loan. Start by contacting them early in the divorce process to see if assumption is even possible.
  • Creditworthiness: Lenders will want to ensure that you’re financially able to handle the mortgage payments. They’ll consider factors like your credit score, debt-to-income ratio, and overall financial history.
  • Required documentation: Be prepared to provide a variety of documents, including your divorce decree, pay stubs, bank statements, and credit reports. The lender will want a full picture of your financial situation.
  • Divorce decree language: Make sure your divorce decree clearly states the terms of any spousal support or property division that might affect your ability to assume the mortgage.

The Loan Assumption Process

Here’s a quick guide to the steps involved in assuming a mortgage:

  1. Consult your divorce decree: Ensure it outlines terms regarding the home and mortgage.
  2. Contact your lender: Find out if your mortgage is assumable and what the requirements are.
  3. Undergo credit evaluation: Your lender will look at your financial health to determine if you qualify.
  4. Provide documentation: Gather and submit all necessary financial documents.
  5. Negotiate terms: Work with the lender to finalize the assumption details.
  6. Sign the agreement: Once the lender approves, you’ll sign the assumption agreement to transfer responsibility.
  7. Legal and financial adjustments: Update legal documents and pay any fees.
  8. Notify relevant parties: Inform your homeowners' insurance, HOA, and other relevant entities.

Costs Involved in a Mortgage Assumption

You may avoid closing costs, but other fees still apply:

  • Assumption fees: Lenders typically charge a fee for processing the assumption, so be prepared for this.
  • Credit report, appraisal, and legal fees: Additional costs may include obtaining your credit report, appraising the property, and covering legal fees.
  • Equalization payments: If there’s a disparity in the home’s value after the assumption, an equalization payment may be required to even things out between you and your ex.

A Word of Caution

Before jumping into a mortgage assumption, be sure to understand the potential risks:

Liability

If the loan goes into default after you assume it, your ex-spouse might still face some legal responsibility, depending on the terms of the original loan.

Lender Communication

It’s critical to communicate clearly with the lender and ensure all potential risks are discussed before signing on the dotted line.

Alternatives to Mortgage Assumption

If assuming the mortgage after divorce isn’t the best option for you, there are several alternatives to consider.

Each offers a different approach to managing the family home and navigating your financial future, depending on your personal goals and circumstances.

Refinancing

One of the most common alternatives is refinancing the mortgage. This involves obtaining a new mortgage in your name alone, essentially replacing the existing mortgage.

While refinancing can give you full control over the property, it often comes with closing costs and depends on your creditworthiness and income. If you qualify, it can be a clean way to separate finances from your ex-spouse.

Home Equity Line of Credit (HELOC)

A Home Equity Line of Credit (HELOC) allows you to access the equity in the home to finance a buyout of your ex-spouse’s share. This option is particularly useful if you wish to remain in the home but need cash to settle the division of property.

However, it increases your overall debt and may require careful planning to ensure payments are manageable.

Selling the Home

Selling the home is a straightforward option that allows both parties to divide the proceeds and move on.

This can be an ideal choice if neither spouse can afford the mortgage on their own or if the home holds too many emotional ties. Selling provides a clean financial break, enabling both parties to start fresh.

Buyout Arrangement

In a buyout arrangement, one spouse purchases the other’s share of the home. This allows the buying spouse to retain ownership without the need for refinancing or mortgage assumption.

It can be a simpler solution, provided the buying spouse can afford to pay the agreed value of the ex-spouse’s share.

Purchasing a New Home

Purchasing a new home provides a fresh start, allowing both individuals to move forward without the financial and emotional connections to the previous family home. For many, this can be the best way to begin a new chapter and start building equity in a different property. Financial and Tax Considerations

When considering mortgage assumption during a divorce, it's important to think about the financial and tax implications.

Assuming a mortgage can have a direct impact on your credit and debt-to-income ratio, which lenders carefully assess. This change could affect your ability to take on new loans or credit in the future, as your debt load will increase.

You might also benefit from tax advantages, such as the mortgage interest deduction, which could reduce your taxable income and help ease the financial burden.

However, other costs like property taxes and home maintenance are now solely your responsibility. Additionally, you’ll need to be mindful of potential capital gains taxes if you eventually sell the property.

Refinancing options may become more limited depending on your financial standing after the assumption. Insurance policies for both the home and mortgage will also need to be updated to reflect your new sole ownership.

Facing Divorce in California? We Can Help.

Divorce is never easy, and when it comes to the home, emotions can run high. At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we understand the importance of protecting your future.

Our team of Certified Family Law Specialists is ready to guide you through every step of the process. Contact us today at 855-426-9111  for a consultation, and let us help you find the best solution for your unique situation.

Are Divorce Records Public in California? What You Need To Know

Divorce can be tough, and as you navigate the process in California, you may be wondering if your divorce records will be available to the public. There are multiple reasons that someone may not want this information to be revealed.

Perhaps they just want to retain their privacy around this sensitive matter, the divorce could affect their business dealings, or maybe they just want to avoid the social judgment that can come along with it.

Whatever the case may be, we can help you understand the process so that you know your options. In California, divorce records are considered public information, meaning anyone can access them unless specific circumstances allow for privacy. Let’s break down what this means, why it matters, and how you can access or potentially protect your records.

What Are Divorce Records?

Divorce records include all the documents filed in your case, such as:

  • Divorce Decree: The official court document that finalizes your divorce. It includes important details like property division, spousal support, and child custody arrangements.
  • Financial Affidavits: These are income and expense declarations that provide a snapshot of your financial situation during the divorce.
  • Custody Agreements: Parenting plans that outline how children will be raised after a divorce, including time-sharing and decision-making responsibilities.
  • Property Division Orders: Details on how assets and debts are divided between you and your spouse.

Other documents, like motions, pleadings, and court orders, are also part of the public record. Unless your case involves sensitive issues or you request a special court order, most of this information will be available to anyone who requests it.

California Law and Public Access

California operates under the California Public Records Act, which generally makes most court records, including divorce cases, available to the public. According to this law, court records are open unless the court decides to seal them for specific reasons. It's important to understand the distinction between court records and public records:

  • Court records include everything filed in your divorce case, from initial petitions to final judgments. These are stored at the courthouse where your case was handled.
  • Public records refer to the information that anyone can access, either online or in person, without needing a specific legal reason.

Who Can Access Divorce Records?

Practically anyone can access divorce records, but some of the more common people who might request them include:

  • Researchers: Those studying family law trends or public policies might review divorce cases.
  • Journalists: Divorce cases involving public figures often attract media attention.
  • Individuals in Legal Proceedings: If you're involved in a legal case where a previous divorce impacts child custody or support issues, obtaining records from that divorce may be relevant.
  • Curious Individuals: Anyone, from neighbors to distant relatives, can access these records out of curiosity.

How To Access Divorce Records in California

If you’re looking to access divorce records in California, it’s relatively simple. Here’s how you can do it:

  1. Identify the Relevant Superior Court: Find the county where the divorce was finalized. This is key because divorce records are kept in the Superior Court of the county where the divorce occurred.
  2. Visit the Courthouse in Person: You can go directly to the court's clerk's office and request a copy of the records. Keep in mind that there might be a fee associated with obtaining copies.
  3. Submit a Request by Mail: If visiting the courthouse isn’t possible, you can mail in a request with case information (like case number or the names of the parties involved) and any required fees.
  4. Check Online Resources: Many counties offer online access to divorce records through their websites. However, not all details may be available this way.
  5. Utilize the California Courts Website: The California Courts website provides resources for finding court information and accessing public records.

Privacy Concerns

Even though divorce records are public, there are ways to protect some of your personal information. Privacy can be a real concern, especially for those with high-profile or sensitive cases. Here’s what you need to know about privacy and divorce records:

  • Mediation Confidentiality: If your divorce involves mediation, the information shared in those sessions is confidential and won’t be part of the public record.
  • Sealing Records: In rare cases, you may be able to ask the court to seal your records. This is usually reserved for situations involving domestic violence, child abuse, or cases with highly sensitive financial information. However, sealing records is not automatic—you’ll need to show the court why privacy is essential in your case.
  • Redaction: While divorce records are public, certain sensitive information, such as Social Security numbers and financial account details, is automatically redacted from public view. This helps to maintain some level of privacy, even though the bulk of your case is accessible to the public.
  • Collaborative Divorce: For those who want to keep more information out of the public eye, a collaborative divorce might be a good option. This process focuses on negotiating terms privately, potentially reducing the amount of information that ends up in public records.

Concerned About Your Privacy During Divorce in California?

Divorce is a personal and challenging experience, and concerns about your privacy are completely understandable. At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we’re here to help you understand your rights when it comes to divorce records.

If privacy is a priority for you, our team of Certified Family Law Specialists can provide guidance and help you explore your options to protect sensitive information. Contact us today at (855)-426-9111 for a confidential consultation, and let’s discuss how we can assist you during this process.

Why Are Military Divorce Rates So High?

When it comes to divorce, military families face a straining and stressful process. The Certified Family Law Specialists at Holstrom, Block & Parke know just how overwhelming the process can be, as we’ve handled many unique and challenging military divorce cases.

But what makes military divorces so common in the first place? The divorce rate in the military tends to hover around 4%, slightly higher than the 2.5% seen in civilian populations. While these numbers don’t seem worlds apart, military life pressures can make marriage far more difficult.

In fact, military divorce rates fluctuate depending on age, years of service, and the personal experiences of service members. Let’s explore some key stages in a military career and how they impact the likelihood of divorce.

Early Career Divorces

It's no secret that many young service members marry early, often in their early 20s. These relationships, while full of optimism, are sometimes rushed.

Young service members may feel the pressure of long deployments or financial instability. Without much life experience, the idea of marriage might seem like a grounding force in an otherwise unstable time. But the reality of marriage can be much tougher.

Many early-career divorces happen because young couples aren’t prepared for the realities of military life. It’s a challenging transition, and the lifestyle can strain even the most committed partnerships.

Long separations due to deployments, combined with the financial strain of starting a family on a military salary, often lead to frustration. When you're just starting out and already under pressure, it can feel like you're fighting an uphill battle every day.

The impact of these divorces isn’t just emotional—it can also have financial consequences. Service members going through an early-career divorce may face complications with military benefits or even see their career trajectories altered as they navigate these personal struggles.

Mid-Career Challenges

As service members move into their late 20s and 30s, their career demands often increase, and their families grow. At this stage, frequent relocations, career advancements, and the added responsibility of raising children can make it hard to maintain a healthy marriage. This mid-career period tends to be a turning point for many military couples.

The pressures of constant moving, coupled with the emotional toll of long deployments, can cause spouses to grow apart. Military families often find themselves living in new places, away from their support networks.

It’s not just the service member who is affected by the demands of the job; the spouse and children also bear the weight of these changes. For many, the stress builds up over time, leading to feelings of isolation or resentment.

Mid-career divorces are also tricky when it comes to dividing assets, especially military pensions and retirement benefits. Service members who have been in the military for a decade or more often find themselves negotiating not just emotional and physical custody of children, but also how to fairly divide the financial future they’ve worked so hard to build.

Post-Deployment Divorces

The time immediately following a deployment is often the most fragile for military families. Divorce rates spike within the first year of a service member’s return home, as the reintegration process is far from simple.

After months apart, both the service member and their spouse have changed. They may have lived separate lives, and adjusting to being together again can be overwhelming.

The psychological impact of deployment—whether it’s PTSD, anxiety, or simply the strain of being away—often plays a big role in post-deployment divorces. Service members return home to a world that has moved on without them, and the adjustment can be jarring.

Spouses, on the other hand, have grown accustomed to handling everything on their own. This mismatch of expectations can lead to significant emotional conflict.

During this period, both service members and their spouses must seek support, whether through counseling or mental health services. Open communication and professional guidance can make all the difference when it comes to keeping a marriage intact after deployment.

Late-Career and Retirement Transitions

For service members approaching their 40s and 50s, the end of their military career can be both a relief and a source of anxiety. With retirement on the horizon, couples face the challenge of redefining their roles and identities outside of the military structure that has shaped their lives.

Divorce rates among late-career service members highlight how difficult this transition can be. Suddenly, a couple that has been together for decades is faced with planning for a future that doesn’t include the military.

Financial concerns, unresolved issues from earlier in the marriage, and the stress of preparing for life after the military can put even the most solid marriages at risk.

One of the biggest hurdles in these divorces is the division of retirement pay and healthcare benefits. Service members are entitled to a wide range of benefits in retirement, and dividing these assets requires careful legal guidance to ensure both parties receive their fair share.

Facing Divorce? California Service Members, We're Here for You

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, we understand how military service impacts families, and we’re here to help you through it. Our Certified Family Law Specialists and legal team have guided numerous families through the challenges of early-career and near-retirement military divorce.

If you’re a California service member facing divorce, don’t hesitate to reach out to us at (855) 827-6639 for a consultation. Alternatively, you can use our online contact form. We’re committed to securing the best outcome for you and your family.

Divorce: How It Impacts Children at Different Ages

Divorce is hard for everyone involved, but when children are part of the equation, it adds another layer of complexity. At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we understand just how challenging this time can be.

With over 300 years of combined experience in family law, our team is dedicated to guiding families through the difficulties of divorce, particularly when children are involved. One question we’ve faced again and again is: Does divorce impact children of different ages in different ways?

The short answer is: yes. The effects of divorce vary and partly depend on a child’s age and developmental stage. As parents, understanding these differences can help provide the right support and ensure our children get through this challenging time as smoothly as possible.

Let's take a closer look at how divorce impacts children across different age groups.

What is The Worst Age For Divorce For Children

There is, of course, no one-size-fits-all answer to how children will react to divorce. While some might struggle more at certain stages, one thing is certain – all children will experience some level of disruption. Here’s how divorce may affect them, depending on their age.

Infants and Toddlers (0-3 Years)

At this young age, children are developing their sense of security and attachment. Divorce can disrupt routines that help them feel safe and settled. Often, changes in sleep patterns or eating habits occur as they pick up on the emotional tension around them, even if they can’t fully understand what's happening.

The key here is maintaining consistency—whether it's in caregiving or keeping their environment as familiar as possible. Stability helps ease the stress that even very young children can feel during a divorce.

Preschoolers (3-5 Years)

Preschool-aged children are naturally egocentric, meaning they often believe the world revolves around them. As a result, when their parents divorce, they may mistakenly think it’s their fault. They might ask questions like, “Did I do something wrong?”

It’s not uncommon for preschoolers to show regressive behavior—like reverting to bedwetting or having tantrums—as a way of coping with their confusion.

At this stage, parents must reassure them that they are still loved and that the divorce isn’t their fault. Keeping explanations simple and age-appropriate, while reinforcing that both parents will continue to care for them, helps provide the emotional security they need.

School-Aged Children (6-12 Years)

Children in this age range are better able to understand the concept of divorce, but that doesn’t mean it’s any easier for them. School-aged kids might feel torn between their parents and experience loyalty conflicts.

Some may struggle with academic performance, or start acting out as they process their feelings. It’s important to encourage open communication and give them space to express their emotions.

Anxiety and behavioral changes are common in this group. Parents should be on the lookout for these signs and make sure their children know it's okay to talk about their feelings. Offering extra support at school and home can help them navigate these tricky waters.

Teenagers (13-18 Years)

Teens can think abstractly and thus process divorce differently than younger children. They may express their emotions through anger, rebellion, or by withdrawing from family activities. Some might even take on a protective role, trying to shield younger siblings from the emotional fallout.

For teenagers, it’s important to find a balance between respecting their growing independence and still offering guidance. Divorce can sometimes increase the risk of mental health struggles for teens, so keeping the lines of communication open is essential. Remind them that while the family structure may be changing, they aren’t alone in this experience.

Legal Considerations in Divorce with Children

In California, the courts always prioritize the "best interests of the child" when handling divorce cases involving children. That means decisions about custody, child support, and visitation are all focused on what will serve the child’s emotional, physical, and developmental needs.

Custody and Visitation

There are several types of custody arrangements that parents may agree on, or a court may decide. The goal is always to provide a stable and nurturing environment for the child, regardless of the specific arrangement.

Child Support

Child support is calculated based on both parents' incomes and the needs of the child. The obligation to support a child financially is shared between both parents, and the court ensures the arrangements are fair.

Parenting Plans

A solid parenting plan is critical to addressing the specific needs of children at every developmental stage. It outlines how time will be divided between parents and how decisions about the child’s welfare will be made. It should also account for children’s unique, age-based developmental needs.

Mitigating the Impact of Divorce on Children

While divorce can be tough on kids, there are steps parents can take to lessen the negative impact and support their children through this time.

Open Communication

Honest, age-appropriate conversations about what’s happening can help children understand and feel reassured. Let them know it’s okay to ask questions and share their feelings.

Co-Parenting

It’s essential for both parents to work together, putting aside personal differences to avoid exposing their children to conflict. A peaceful co-parenting relationship can make a world of difference in how children cope with divorce.

Maintaining Routines

Children thrive on routine, especially in times of uncertainty. Keeping their day-to-day lives as consistent as possible—school schedules, extracurricular activities, and even bedtimes—can provide much-needed stability.

Seeking Professional Help

Some children may benefit from talking to a therapist or counselor who can help them process their emotions. If your child is having a particularly hard time adjusting, seeking professional help can make a difference.

How Holstrom, Block & Parke Can Help

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, we understand that every family’s situation is unique, and we’re here to help guide you through every step of the divorce process. Whether it’s working through custody arrangements or creating a parenting plan that supports your children’s needs, our Certified Family Law Specialists are committed to providing compassionate and effective legal support.

If you're a California resident looking for help with your divorce, call Holstrom, Block & Parke today at (855) 827-6639 for a consultation or fill out our online form. With over 300 years of combined experience, we’re ready to support you and your family during this challenging time.

What if My Spouse Won’t Sign Divorce Papers in California?

If you have a divorce looming over your head, the last thing you need is an uncooperative spouse. Despite the reasons why things are stagnant, it’s frustrating and stressful not to be able to move on from the past in peace.

Thankfully, California law frees you from being at the mercy and whims of an unwilling or stubborn spouse.

We've seen spouses time after time try to stall or derail the divorce by not signing those papers. While annoying, it can be overcome, and we're more than happy to help you take the necessary steps so you can move forward with your life.

We'll explain the no-fault divorce system in California, the legal proceedings, and the options available to you if your spouse refuses to cooperate at any point.

Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC has a team of experts with extensive experience in such situations. We’re committed to supporting you through this process while instilling confidence and offering clarity.

Understanding California’s No-Fault Divorce

California’s “no-fault” divorce system aims to bypass a lot of the messy and embarrassing obstacles that can occur within a divorce.

Under this law, neither spouse has to prove any wrongdoing or fault to get a divorce. It doesn’t matter if a party refuses to sign the papers or strongly opposes the decision. Their refusal doesn’t change the fact that you can move forward with the process; all it takes is one party’s desire to end the marriage.

The Process When Your Spouse Won’t Sign

Even with the process being simplified, you still want to be prepared and aware of the proper protocol for handling a refusal to sign. Here’s an overview of what you can expect from start to finish.

Filing for Divorce

The first step in any divorce is filing a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage. This document formally starts the divorce proceedings, and you only need your own signature to get it going.

Once filed, this petition sets the legal wheels in motion.

It signals to the court that you're serious about ending the marriage, and it also notifies your spouse that the process has begun, even if they’re not ready to accept it yet.

Serving Your Spouse

After filing, the next step is serving the divorce papers to your spouse. This is a legal requirement, ensuring that your spouse is officially informed about the divorce proceedings.

However, serving the papers doesn’t mean you need their consent or signature. There are several ways to serve your spouse; and if they’re being particularly difficult, you can request help from a third party, such as a professional process server or law enforcement officer.

If you're already trying to keep things flowing smoothly, make sure you follow the correct procedures here to avoid any delays. But rest assured, your spouse’s refusal to acknowledge or sign the papers at this stage won’t stop the divorce from happening.

The Response Period and Default Judgment

Once served, your spouse has 30 days to respond to the divorce petition. During this time, they can agree, disagree, or raise any issues they might have.

But what happens if they do nothing? If your spouse decides to ignore the petition, the court can proceed without them by granting a “default judgment.”

A default judgment is a legal way of moving the divorce forward when one party refuses to participate.

It grants the court permission to make decisions about the divorce—such as division of assets, child custody, and support—based on the information you provide, without any input from your spouse.

Contested vs. Uncontested Divorce

If your spouse refuses to sign, it doesn't automatically lead to a contested divorce or a drawn-out legal battle.

A contested divorce happens when both parties cannot agree on key issues like asset division, child custody, or spousal support.

In contrast, an uncontested divorce is when both spouses agree on these matters without the court’s intervention.

However, even if your spouse is initially uncooperative, there’s still a chance to reach an uncontested divorce if they eventually come around. If not, the court will step in to resolve the contested issues, but the divorce itself will still proceed.

Managing a Default Divorce

If your spouse continues to be stubborn and you move toward a default divorce, there are specific steps to follow.

First, you’ll need to submit the necessary paperwork to the court, including a Request to Enter Default. This paperwork essentially asks the court to proceed with the divorce based on your original petition.

Once the default is granted, the court will schedule a hearing to finalize the divorce.

At this hearing, the judge will review your requests for property division, custody, and support and will issue a final judgment.

The key here is that your spouse’s refusal to participate means the court will generally approve your requests, provided they are reasonable and within the bounds of California law.

Don’t Face Divorce Alone—Let Our 300+ Years of Combined Experience Guide You

Divorce is never easy, especially when dealing with a spouse who won't budge. You'll need support, and that's where we step in.

At Holstrom, Block & Parke, APLC, we understand how challenging this process can be. With over 300 years of combined experience, our team is ready to guide you every step of the way. We’re committed to helping you achieve the best possible outcome.

Our Certified Family Law Specialists have handled many cases like yours. We know the tactics that non-cooperative spouses use, and we know how to counter them effectively.

If you’re facing a situation where your spouse won’t sign the divorce papers, don’t wait. Contact us today to discuss your options. We offer confidential consultations where we can explore your situation in detail and provide personalized legal advice. Call us at (855) 939-9111 or visit our contact page to schedule your consultation.

Let us help you move forward with confidence and peace of mind.

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